No seriously, try it?  

If you ever try Yoga, you’ll probably do this move.  Except you’ll come nowhere close to demonstrating the flexibility that a little baby does. 

So what does this have to do with our Acts 2 Groups?

Several of our groups have grown out of the infant stage and have matured over time.  Unfortunately, some of those groups have also lost the flexibility that they had in their infant stage.

As our groups mature, we tend to stick to the things that make us comfortable, the things we’ve always done in the past.  Prayer  times are skipped in order to spend a little more “fellowship” time together.  We’ll skip a meeting because we’re all sooooo busy.  We’ll stop trying to reach out to others in our community because of a few unsuccessful attempts.

Here’s my challenge to our groups, especially our group leaders.  If your group has “hit a wall”, start over.  For some of you, it may be as serious as disbanding and forming two separate groups.  For others, you may need to sit down and discuss the structure of your entire group and see what needs to be changed.    Whatever you decide to do, bathe it in prayer first and let God determine your course.

For some reason, when a group starts to mature, they often tend to get comfortable with what got them to that point.  Unfortunately (or rather fortunately from a spiritual perspective) the members of the group have changed their personalities.  Yet, as a group, we like to follow the same format that took us from infancy to maturity.

The funny thing about flexibility, is you don’t realize you are losing it until it is gone.   If I sit down to try the “Happy Baby” stretch, I’ll never get my legs as far and as comfortable as my son.  Yet somehow, I missed the day where that flexibility just went away.

However, you can get that flexibility back.  If I perform that stretch every day, I’ll become more flexiblle over time.

So let’s start “stretching” today.  And if you pull a hamstring in the process of reading this, I know a good physical therapist that can help you out.

It’s a common theme within our Acts 2 groups.  For whatever reason, many groups are having trouble attracting visitors.  Some groups however, consistently bring visitors, some of whom become regular members of the group. 

The first piece of advice I can give you is  so easy, yet so many of us overlook it.  You have to actually INVITE someone.  I know this sounds crazy, but I’ll use a running analogy to illustrate. 

A few years ago, I asked a running friend what I could do to improve my times.  His response, “If you want to run faster, you have to run faster.”  He further went on to explain that you had to train at a faster pace over a shorter distance and over time, the pace will feel normal.

The same holds true for inviting people.  If you never invite people to your group, you’ll never have visitors.  Sure, at first, it will be tough and painful.  You’ll be rejected and you’ll spend a lot of time inviting someone who never comes.  Over time, however, it will become a natural part of your process to invite people to your group.

“But we don’t know who to invite”

Why don’t you start with the person sitting next to you in our worship services on Sunday morning? 

Sounds crazy, I know!  But did you know that approximately 40-50% of the people attending Sunday morning worship services are NOT actively involved in an Acts 2 Group?    Asking your neighbor that has shown no interest in a relationship with Christ to visit your group is hard, however, asking someone sitting next to you to attend your group, well that’s pretty easy.

(Side note.  This is why we ask you guys to send in your attendance.  I know it’s a pain to remember, but we’re currently trying to put together a list of members not actively involved in a group.  So please help the ladies in the office by sending them in.  The church doesn’t want the information so that they can brag about how many members are attending small groups or so they can hound someone for missing one week.  Some families that might fit in perfectly with your group might be on that list.)

“But if they aren’t in a group, they probably don’t want to be in one?”

If that is what you think, consider the case of Matt and Holly Farmer.  Matt and Holly attended UCC for over a year before they attended an Acts 2 group.  They are very quiet and they were the type that sat in the back of the church and didn’t talk to anyone.  Since joining the Streetman group (after they were invited  by Stacy McDaniel) they have become much more involved.  The Farmers even taught the Kindergarten class this winter on Wednesday nights.

When I asked Matt why they didn’t just join a group, they said that there was no way they would just “invite” themselves to a group.  They were just to shy.

Maybe the family sitting next to you is the next set of “Farmers” in the church.  Who knows???

“We keep inviting, but no one ever comes”

The question becomes “What are you inviting them to?”  Our groups should look like this.  However, to often our groups are either serious Bible studies with no social interaction or they are social clubs with a quick “lesson.”

Think about when you want to have someone over to your house.  Do you clean it up and make it look more presentable?  The same will hold true with your group should you start inviting people.  You’ll want to make it something that is more presentable.  Let them see your dirty laundry later…

Also, let them see that you are just normal people.  Our group has four families that we are specifically targeting.  We’re going to have a parents vs children kickball night in the future.  The night is specifically planned so that the potential visitors will see that we aren’t crazy monks that sit in our house and debate the woman’s role in the church.  As long as I don’t go crazy about the officiating in the kickball game, then they might be more likely to come to a bible study the next week.

Remember, the key is to actually invite someone.  If you have an effective story of inviting someone, share

After seeing the responses from most of you regarding your demographics, it became increasingly clear that our small groups are…well… not so small.

There are several contributing factors to this problem. 

1. Lack of people willing to lead a group.

2. Several groups have existed and grown for years, yet they are unwilling to split.

3. Other groups have failed and the remaining groups have absorbed the ”shrapnel”

“But we love our group!! We’ve been meeting for years and everything is going ok.  We don’t care about that we have a lot of families in it.  We can handle it.”

 I hear you.  I really do.  But let me ask you. 

Does your group follow the “Acts 2″ group model?

Are you so maxed out in space, that you can’t add another family into the group?

Does everyone really feel comfortable enough in the group to open up, or is the group so large it is in effect “another Sunday School class”?

It’s hard to accomplish growth, both spiritually and physically, in a large group. 

And you definitely won’t have a desire or ability to invite others.

I hear you Timmy D, and I may or may not agree with you, but splitting is not an option. We tried to split in the past, but it just didn’t work.

Not surprisingly, this is common.  And the real heart of the matter here, is the original group wasn’t set up correctly to begin with.  Instead of focusing on prayer and growing the group spiritually to the point where we can multiply, many of us treat our groups like deciding which van to ride on during a youth group trip.  Everyone wants to “sit with” their friends and the thought of being away from them and being with “other” people is not so good.

If we treat our Acts 2 Groups  similar to hanging out with everyone from the cool van, then we’ll never experience quality groups.  Instead, we’ll have several large groups that are extremely similar to our Sunday school classes.

Think about the youth trips analogy again.  Sure, you can have a lot of fun in a big van, but don’t you learn a lot more about someone when you ride in a car with three other people? 

So what do we do now?

If you have an established group and you probably need to split, or you don’t know where to go, I suggest you go back to the drawing board with your group.  Is prayer central to your meeting time, or is fellowship?  Do you openly talk about splitting some day because you are too big?

Just some thoughts for you guys.  If you want to talk more, please feel free to contact me and we’ll look at the dynamics of your group.

You think about it 5 minutes before, you discuss things while you’re there and then you don’t think about it again until next week.

And then you think, “Wow!  Why are we having trouble getting this thing going?”

As leaders, you will set the tone for the group.  If you have prepared ahead of time, called a couple of members in the group during the week to check on them, and prayed regularly for the group, you won’t treat this as another meeting.

You’ll treat it as a ministry. 

And this gets to the real heart of the matter.

As a leader, do you treat your Acts 2 group like a ministry?  Do you genuinely care about the spiritual health of your group and each individual member?

Or are you a “leader”  in name only?  Do you “lead” the discussion, but that’s about it.

If you’re struggling with those issues or any others, let me know.  I’d love to pray with you about it.

Does your group look like this?

What do you need to change?

What obstacles are in front of you?

Acts 2 Groups

“University is a church of small groups, not a church that does small groups.”

Build Community – University church expects Acts 2 groups to be the primary vehicle for members to develop strong relationships.

            Acts 2 groups meet weekly for prayer, bible study, sharing, and fellowship.

            Acts 2 groups should plan periodic (once a quarter) purely social activities.

            (cook-outs, game nights,  holiday parties, etc…)

               Acts 2 groups should strive to invite church members who are not currently involved in a group to join theirs.

Member Care – University church expects Acts 2 groups to provide primary care for members of their group.  

            Church staff must inform Acts 2 leaders of group members who are hospitalized, have experienced a death in the family, or have been  consistently absent.

            Acts 2 leaders must make sure the member in need receives appropriate care from group (visit, phone call, meals, flowers, etc…)

            Acts 2 leaders should inform church leadership if there is are deeper issues that require the attention of the ministerial staff or elders.

Community Outreach – University church expects Acts 2 groups to be a close community that maintains an outward focus.

            Acts 2 groups are expected to work closely with their community adopt partner.

            Acts 2 groups should spend time every week praying for people they care about who are unchurched or dechurched.

            Acts 2 groups should periodically host non-threatening events or activities specially geared for their unchurched or dechurched friends.

Celebrate God’s Grace – University church expects Acts 2 groups to celebrate within the group and with the church the transformative work of God.

            Acts 2 groups should keep a journal of weekly prayer requests.  The group should regularly take time to praise and celebrate how God is faithful to answer prayer.

            Acts 2 groups should regularly share with church leadership examples of how God is working in their group and through their group.

Let me be completely honest.  With the responsibility of providing training and leadership for the Acts 2 group leaders in our church, I’ve done a terrible job.  Through some encouragement from my accountability partners, that is going to change.

I’ve spoken to several of you over the last few weeks, and if I haven’t spoken to you, expect a phone call soon.  The purpose of those conversations is to discover where we stand with our Acts 2 Groups.

I’ve discovered that some of you are thriving, some struggling.  Some have questions about how to handle a specific situation, others don’t know where to start.

We’ll use this site to share information and to discuss those questions and issues that keep popping up like:

What do we do with the children?

What do we do?  Our group is too big.

My group doesn’t seem to care.

What’s this serving in the community all about?

We’re struggling with finding something to study.

And so on….

You get the picture.

Also, we will be ordering and I’ll be getting a copy of the book Community Life 101 to you.  It’s a must read for Acts 2 Group Leaders.  And best of all, it’s short.

If you are struggling right now and I haven’t spoken to you personally, please give me a call.  I’m not promising any immediate answers, but I am promising to pray with you and with God’s help, we’ll work through it together.

I’ll be updating this site, at least weekly, and will e-mail you once the site has been updated. 

If you don’t know where to start, let me give you this suggestion.

Call at least one member of your group this week.  Ask them how they are doing and just listen.  At the end of your conversation, pray with them over the phone about what they just talked about.  

It’s the first step to building community within your group…..

Timmy D